White Supremacists: Take A Page Out of My Book

Literally. Semi-spoiler alert – things don’t end well for them. But I’m not talking about my Downriver Trilogy, I’m offering some advice on how to get right with becoming a minority in this country.

You see, they’ve already taken a page out of the civil rights movement’s book by positioning themselves as victims of injustice and in staging demonstrations to publicize their plight to the world.

They’ve co-opted the language of that struggle by framing their message in freedom --- freedom to live around others of their kind, rejoicing in their culture and ensuring their survival – kind of a reverse integration sort of thing. So take the lesson one step further and learn what it means to be a minority in America from those whom you simultaneously disdain and emulate.

The WhiSups -- I pronounce that so it sounds like “wassup,” but then I’m a little twisted -- are the violent, vocal contingent of those suffering from the Angry White Male Syndrome (see earlier blog describing that affliction). They’re pissed off because time is not on their side, nor are demographics.

The power to exclude others from the best educations and the best jobs and the best healthcare and the best justice that they’ve relied on for hundreds of years is finally waning; and like all things based on majority rule, there will be some who are left in the minority.

Take heart, WhiSups, all is not lost. Look at African Americans for example. We set the standard for all things fashion and music and cool. We dominate every sport we play – and once they build skating rinks in the hood or enough middle class Blacks take up hockey, we’ll dominate that one too. We’ve excelled at every single endeavor of modern life even against all the odds stacked against us.

True, we’re disproportionately represented in prison – but that’s because we’re so darn easy to spot. Once beige, brown and black folks make up the majority, it might work the other way around.

But don’t worry WhiSups, becoming a minority will make you more resilient and more intent on survival. It will teach you how to do more with less, how to navigate a hostile culture without getting killed (sometimes), how to raise your children to believe in themselves despite everything the dominant culture says about them. It will teach you to be strong.

Strong enough to take your place among civilized folks and realize that, among Homo sapiens, we have one race on this planet. Put down the swastikas and the pointy white hoods and try joining it.